My Version, Untitled

When emotions are
exhausted again, I find
myself at home, alone,
closing all windows, then
stopped in the middle of
the hallway, I scream at
a volume that causes the
Golden Gate to shudder in
acknowledgement.
A moment for prayer.

Lauren Scott © 2018

Inspired by Margaret L. Mitchell’s poem:

Sometimes,
when it is all, finally,
too much,
I climb into my car,
roll the windows up,
and somewhere between
backing out of the driveway
and rounding the first corner
I let out a yell
that would topple Manhattan.
How do you pray?

***Thank you for your compassionate words, thoughts,
and prayers from my prior post. All is better for now,
and we live one day at a time as each day is a gift…
I was talking to my pastor the other day, and she
sent me Margaret Mitchell’s poem. I’ve read this
before, love it, and couldn’t believe how perfectly
it resonated. So I was inspired to write my own version,
but since the idea and wording are similar, I wanted
to cite the author.***

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The Right Time

Within the four walls
memories stir, the smell
of cologne remains
poignant, the sound of
laughter echoes a favorite
tune, tears struggle to
be set free.

The closet’s belly stays 
nearly full after six months’
worth 
of grieving. Clothes
hang 
proudly as if he’ll
search 
for the right shirt
and matching 
pants for the
day’s 
activities, all hoping
to be 
chosen for the outing.
Shoes sit tightly for their
next walk like dogs eagerly
awaiting their master’s call.

Some belongings have
warmed 
the backs of those
in need. But 
emotion’s pull is
firm, so to surrender
 all
feels like a balloon slipping
through fingers, escaping
into the big blue, slowly
fading away…

Lauren Scott © 2018

 

Motherhood

You are little now,
unable to understand
my deepest feelings

Emotions overwhelm me
when I hold you,
when I see your tiny lips
form your biggest smile,
when I hear you laugh
it’s a joyous melody,
when I hear you cry
it’s a heartbreak to bear

I want to protect you
but I’m not in control
Life will bring adventures
meant only for you –
I’ll have to let go

I’ll marvel, though, in each
new change as you grow.

I may be your mommy now
but I’ll always be your
Mom
Loving you more each day
as time takes you away
so you can fly
and realize your
own life

Lauren Scott © 

(It seems like a hundred years ago 
when I wrote this, when I first
became a mom. It was the most
wonderful feeling. I felt like I was
walking on clouds. I still feel this
way even now that my kids are
in their twenties. They have been
the biggest miracle in my life, along
with my husband, and I’m beyond
grateful. I hope you enjoy these words
from 
back when.) 💕

 

Mystified

I’ve reached a place
I never dared to imagine
There is beauty here
but also emotional pain
The invisible line can be
clearly seen but it has
yet to be crossed
Is this reality or dream?

Lauren Scott © 2015