Have you ever compared your success to that of your friends, neighbors, or acquaintances? I assume most of us have done this; I know I have. Of course, you want them to be successful in every way. But obtaining a valid discernment from surface only, gives you no facts. Everyone has a story.
If you compare yourself to your perception of others, then the possibility of your self-esteem deflating is great. The negative assumptions you allow to roll around in your mind can be harmful to your mental well-being. Even though the outward appearance seems perfect, it’s exactly that. ‘Seems’ may be the key word because that individual could be struggling inwardly.
Is there one method of how you measure success? Essentially, it’s up to interpretation. What does success mean to you? Think about what you want in life. What kind of person do you aspire to be? In my opinion, here’s what you shouldn’t do – don’t give dollar signs too much power in measuring success. They can be misleading. Other factors display victory, such as volunteering, honest work ethic, being a loving parent, sister, daughter, son, friend, etc. The list is endless.
Think carefully how you measure success because the last thing you need is to fall into a depressed mind-set caused by comparing yourself to others. Letting those unfavorable thoughts take control of your mind will only create clutter and make things messy in your life. So, here’s a must-do…focus on what makes you feel successful. Everyone has demons. It’s in our DNA to judge. That doesn’t mean it’s healthy. You and I both know it’s not, so try not to do it. It’s as simple as that. Focus on you, not on how others seem on the outside.
Do you have any thoughts on this subject? Any experiences? For example, I’ll start by saying that since I didn’t go to college, I’ve compared myself to those who have. As a result, at times, my mood shifted into puddles of negativity. As some of you may remember, I did a post years ago about returning to school. I was excited and had taken all the English courses (which I loved) needed for an Associates Degree. Then I began thinking, “Why am I doing this?” I truly thought deeply about what going back to school would entail. Sure, the diploma would look great hanging on the wall next to my husband’s and children’s. However, I came to the realization that a college degree doesn’t define who I am. I’m Me with or without it. So, I didn’t quit; I just chose not to continue, but I gained a lot from those English classes I took. This entire paragraph’s subject may sound silly to you, but was anything but silly to me – divulging this is me being vulnerable, too. Moving forward, I no longer think those college-educated people are better than me. What they accomplished is commendable, and it’s as simple as that.
The easy road spirals downward; the challenging road stimulates your mind and nudges you to look deeply within yourself.
All photos courtesy of Google.