What About Us Now?

How do we move forward?
What can possibly replace
your phone calls each night?

With both of you gone now,
our family circle is broken

When I opened your closet
door and saw your clothes
hanging with no purpose,
and your shoes wondering
where they’ll walk next,
the floodgates unlatched
mournful tears

What about us now?
We’re orphaned adults
watching our faces and
bodies change as we age

What about us now?
We have no choice
but to fuse the circle
back together with
the love we have
for each other…

Three girls who
now live
in a changed world

Lauren Scott August 2017
(To Dad, who passed away 8/7/17,
and in memory of both my parents
who are now together again)

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53 thoughts on “What About Us Now?

  1. Lauren, I’m sorry to hear of your recent loss. It’s hard when both our parents have passed. (I too am an adult orphan.) It takes time, but I hope you’ll find comfort in the memories. Take good care!
    Betty πŸ’•

    • Thanks, Betty, for your comforting words. It’s all a part of life, but that doesn’t make it easy. I’m sorry to hear you’re also an adult orphan. I know the memories will begin and then continue to provide peace of mind to my sisters and me. I hope you’re doing well…❀

      • That’s true – it doesn’t make it easier. Though most at my age are orphans. You’re younger which means your parents must’ve been relatively young and that would make it harder for sure. I lost my younger son 3 months ago and that’s been more painful than anything. He was just 44.
        Anyway, it does seem that grief hits us all at one time or another. It helps a little to know we aren’t alone. Sending you comforting thoughts and sympathy. πŸŒΈπŸ’•πŸ’•

      • Oh, I’m so sorry to hear about your son, Betty. Losing a child is different than losing a parent, although I’m not downplaying what my family has gone through. But losing a child at any age, well, I can’t imagine, so my heart truly aches for you. As to my parents, they’re actually older, lived well into their 90’s. I’m the baby and have older sisters. So, it is a blessing that they were with us for so long, but the finality of their passing and missing their physical presence is painful. I meant to tell you that it’s nice to know that as adult orphans now, we aren’t alone. Others understand the process. Anyway, I’m sending you the same, comforting hugs and sympathy…much love…xoxo

  2. Sorry to note your bereavement, Lauren, in your poem that conveys it most poignantly. It is a vacuum that never really fills. Thanks to your parents, the circle now extends from you and your partner to your progenies and theirs. Be well…

    • Hi Raj,
      I appreciate your compassionate words, and you’re right…the circle will expand and my parents will smile down on us, feeling comfort in knowing that their girls will be okay from the foundation they laid for us.
      Take care, and thanks again…

  3. Dear Lauren, my sincere condolences my friend.. I am sure that circle of love you have with your family will certainly fuse back together again.. It is hard when we lose a parent..And our children their grandparent.. You and your family now become a closer circle..
    Love and Blessings my friend. Love Sue ❀

  4. My dear Lauren, I am so sorry to hear about your father. What a lovely tribute you have written to your parents. My father passed 15 years ago and Mom, 11 years ago. I still find I want to talk to them, ask them questions that only they would have the answers to, hear them laugh. They will always be with you in your memories and in your heart. Sending you love and hugs, my sweet friend.

    • Hi Michelle,
      I’m sorry to hear your parents have been gone for so long. But, I can relate so well to wanting to talk to them or ask questions that only they will know the answers to. It’s been five years since Mom passed away, and I can still hear her voice in my mind. I used to talk to Dad each night on the phone, and it hurts not being able to call him. My sisters and I find solace though in knowing our parents are together again. Dad missed his “gal” so much, so that is the blessing. Many hugs and much love to you, too…πŸ’“

    • Thanks, Steve. That’s nice of you to say. My parents are together now, which is a blessing, even though, selfishly, we miss them. They had a 70-year love that is truly eternal…

    • Thanks, Francina. It’s not good to lose a loved one to gather inspiration to write. But the words flowed as my heart ached. Although many blessings are wrapped around the sadness to give us the drive to move forward. Sending love and hugs across the pond, my friend. ❀

    • Thanks so much, Bette, for your kind words and hugs and prayers…Dad lived a long, good life, so his passing was a blessing in many ways. It’s just the finality of missing his physical presence that is tough to comprehend, and then, of course, missing both him and Mom now…it’s strange to not have them around anymore, knowing that my sisters and I are at the top of the family tree. Much love to you…

    • Thanks so much, Eric. It’s nice to see you, and as a little time passes, a little bit of my heart heals. It’s a slow process though, but knowing my parents are together again also brings peace to my mind and heart. Thanks again! Hugs

  5. So very sorry for your loss Lauren. This is such a beautiful, loving tribute. ‘Orphaned Adult’ pretty much describes how I felt when I lost my mother over a decade ago. Still do. Deepest sympathies to you and your sisters. Hugs.

    • Thanks very much, Madhu, and I’m sorry to hear about your mother’s passing, too. You know how it feels then, and it’s surreal, to say the least; isn’t it? Thank you again, and many hugs returned. ❀

  6. Lauren, as always you write with such beautifully gentle and studied perspective. I am sorry to see that you have lost your dear father. Life evolves, it transforms and we adapt and indeed move forward. The cycle of life demands so. There will always be a void when it comes to a lost parent(s). Their memory affords us the recall of their beloved voice, their love, their life perspective and the meaningful influence they had on the lives of yourselves and others.

    We are orphaned, as will our own children and theirs that follow. Yet we were taught instinctively how to gather ourselves and move on, a time-honored tradition among our species. It is in those moments of transition that we rediscover what we learned in our past and how we apply those life lessons moving forward.

    The circle of love shall never be broken for those who embrace its receiving.

    • Thanks so much for your beautiful and insightful comment, Don, and I’m so sorry for replying late. Everything you said is so true, and the circle of love in our family will never be broken because we’re all very close. For this, I’m grateful. I have my moments though, missing Dad and Mom together and how our family used to be. I’ll always carry them in my heart, so they’re with me each and everyday. Thanks again, and I hope you’re doing well, my friend…

  7. Tears for your recent loss of you father. Having been there, I know.

    Reading this lovely,sad poem reminded me of walking into my son’s cliset and seeing his clothes, his shoes knowing he would never wear them again was soul wrenching. Take care. We all walk our own path of grief.

    • Thank you, and I truly lost it when I looked in his closet. Talk about writing inspiration…You’re right though, we all walk our own path of grief. I know time heals, and I’m still waiting…tears still come occasionally and they’ll continue, I’m sure. It’s the finality of it all, as you already know. Take care, too, and thanks again…

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